Raising Awareness – Instilling Hope – Combating Stigma



'Courageous Recovery' from despair puts Lawrence woman on new path
Thursday, October 2, 2008 7:15 AM EDT
By Lea Kahn, Staff Writer

Carol Kivler's efforts on behalf of those suffering from mental illness made her one of four recipients of New Jersey Monthly's 2008 Seeds of Hope Award.

From the deepest seeds of despair have grown the brightest seeds of hope for Carol Kivler – and it is those seeds of hope that Ms. Kivler seeks to spread through Courageous Recovery.

Courageous Recovery, which Ms. Kivler founded three years ago, provides education and compassion about mental illness. It is a topic with which the Lawrence resident is familiar because she has battled against clinical depression for 18 years.

Ms. Kivler's efforts were rewarded last month when she was chosen as one of four recipients of New Jersey Monthly's "2008 Seeds of Hope Award." The award is given to people who go to extraordinary lengths to help and give hope to others.

Courageous Recovery is a division of Kivler Communications, which Ms. Kivler heads. She is a motivational speaker and through Kivler Communications she offers life coaching for executives as well as training and development for a company's employees.

"I make a living at Kivler Communications, but I make a difference with Courageous Recovery," Ms. Kivler said. "The mission of Courageous Recovery is to educate and advocate in the mental health field. I speak at medical schools and nursing schools to incoming health professionals. I literally put a face on mental illness."

She added, "When people say to me, ‘Is recovery possible,' I almost cry. It is more than possible. It is probable. I speak to dozens of consumers and family members as the voice of experience. They are groping for hope, and any glimmer of hope I can give them acts as a catalyst to their own recovery."

Ms. Kivler, who sits on the board of trustees of the Mercer County chapter of the National Alliance of Mental Illness, said she tells family members that their loved one will return to them – but there is no "overnight fix."

The 57-year-old Lawrence resident knows first-hand how difficult recovery can be. She was diagnosed with clinical depression in 1990. Clinical depression differs from situational depression, which is often the result of the loss of a job or loved one or health issues, she said. It often goes away on its own.

But clinical depression has nothing to do with one's situation, Ms. Kivler said. When she first began to suffer from clinical depression, she asked herself why she was depressed. She was married and had three children and there was "money in the bank."

"Clinical depression comes on for no reason," she said. "It comes out of nowhere. Depression robs you of your five senses. Colors look dim and gray, your sense of taste and smell is lost, you might hear someone but (what they say) does not sink in. There is such a grip of hopelessness and you can't stand another minute of how you feel."

Ms. Kivler was hospitalized four times. Her physicians prescribed medication, but they found that her form of clinical depression was "medication-resistant," she said. The pills did not work.

The solution was electroconvulsive therapy – or shock treatment. Since 1990, she has received more than 50 ECT treatments to combat the four major episodes of severe clinical depression. She has not suffered any bouts of depression in several years.

It is not clear why ECT – which lasts about 1 or 2 seconds – helps patients with severe depression, she said. It may be that the electrical shock and subsequent seizure simulate the brain's neurons and reconfigure chemicals that regulate and balance emotions. Or the seizure may alter the body's hormonal system to relieve depression, she said.

Although ECT has been out of vogue, it is now coming back into favor, Ms. Kivler said. The American Psychiatric Association says ECT has a success rate of 80 percent, compared to a 40 to 45 percent success rate for medication, she said.

Although Ms. Kivler has worked hard to overcome her clinical depression, the challenge now is to help people overcome their fears and perceptions of mental illness. There is still a stigma attached to mental illness, she said.

"I remember someone saying something and the doctor looked at me and backed away from me," Ms. Kivler recalled. "I said, ‘You can't catch it from me.' How sad that if our own physicians have a skewed view, how can you expect the general population (to deal with it)."

Ms. Kivler said she considers her mental illness to be a blessing. She said it has taught her to live one day at a time, after hiding it for years. It took time to accept that her clinical depression is a lifelong ailment, she said.

But in between her bouts of clinical depression – the last one occurred eight years ago – Ms. Kivler said she is a highly functioning human being. She decided to begin telling her story as proof that recovery is probable, and eventually was placed on NAMI Mercer's board after she founded Courageous Recovery.

The problem with mental health disorders is that the stigma can be worse than the illness, and that's why no one wants to talk about it, she said. Mental illness is a lonely disease, she said, and when one suffers in silence, "you isolate yourself more."

She added, "The bottom line is, the more we educate and advocate for people diagnosed with a mental illness, (the more easily) you can normalize it. I remember a time when you couldn't mention the word ‘cancer.' Depression is part of who I am, but it doesn't define me."

For Carol Kivler's Media Kit click HERE.